Posted in Life & Wellness, Psychology, Relationships

Relationships Matter

According to studies, one of the things that makes a good life is having good relationship with other people. Being in a warm, loving, and protective relationship does not only make us happier, but it also makes us healthier because it helps prevent us from acquiring chronic diseases that are caused by loneliness and stress.

However, not all relationships are healthy and happy. They could be messy, complicated, or even toxic. Good relationships are not worked out overnight. They need to be tended in order to flourish.

Here are some tips to develop good quality relationships:
1. Communicate– express what you think and feel. Do not assume that other people could read what’s on your mind. Not all people are expert on body language so it’s best to communicate verbally, otherwise you risk being misinterpreted or worse, being unnoticed.

2.Acknowledge– show that you appreciate your partners, children or friends. There is no such thing as silent gratitude. You have to let people know when they did something that made you happy. It will not only reinforce good behavior, but more importantly, they will feel valued and worthy. So catch them at their best and be generous in giving well-deserved praises!

3.Do not Police– Don’t wait for other people to commit mistakes and reprimand like a police officer. If you care about the person, let them be aware of their destructive behavior before it gets worse. This will show them that you care.

4. Accept– Accept that other people are not perfect and so are you. There will always be instances when they could hurt you, or YOU HURT THEM. But always remember that you love them more! So be quick to say sorry and to forgive, and always remind yourself to forget!

5.Be Playful– Do not take things too seriously. When I was in college, I had this mantra for myself: “All problems have solutions. If it doesn’t have a solution, it’s not a problem! So I will not bother…” Learn to laugh at your mistakes and have fun in each other’s company!

People are special. We all need to feel that we are special so let’s start treating each other one! 🙂

(photo source)


Written on: June 07, 2016

Posted in Life & Wellness, Random Happiness

LIFE LESSONS: Interview With God

Hello Friends,

This video that I am sharing with you today is one of the most remarkable videos that I’ve seen so far. I first saw it when I was a freshman in College and I have not forgotten about it.

There are many things that I realized about life in general when I saw this. Perhaps some of you are already familiar with this, but I’d still want to share it as it is a very good reminder for all of us.

I hope that this video will all move us to live our lives better. 🙂

(Video taken from YouTube)

THE INTERVIEW WITH GOD

I dreamed I had an interview with God.

 

“Come in,” God said. “So, you would like to interview Me?”

“If you have the time,” I said.

God smiled and said:

“My time is eternity and is enough to do everything; What questions do you have in mind to ask me?”

 

“What surprises you most about mankind?”

God answered:

“That they get bored of being children, are in a rush to grow up, and then long to be children again…

That they lose their health to make money and then lose their money to restore their health…

That by thinking anxiously about the future, they forget the present, such that they live neither for the present nor the future…

That they live as if they will never die, and they die as if they had never lived.”

 

God’s hands took mine and we were silent for awhile and then I asked… “As a parent, what are some of life’s lessons you want your children to learn?”

God replied with a smile:

“To learn that they cannot make anyone love them. What they can do is to let themselves be loved…

To learn that what is most valuable is not what they have in their lives, but who they have in their lives…

To learn that it is not good to compare themselves to others. All will be judged individually on their own merits, not as a group on a comparison basis…

To learn that a rich person is not the one who has the most, but is one who needs the least…

To learn that it only takes a few seconds to open profound wounds in persons we love, and that it takes many years to heal them…

To learn to forgive by practicing forgiveness…

To learn that there are persons that love them dearly, but simply do not know how to express or show their feelings…

To learn that money can buy everything but happiness…

To learn that two people can look at the same thing and see it totally different…

To learn that a true friend is someone who knows everything about them, and likes them anyway…

To learn that it is not always enough that they be forgiven by others, but that they have to forgive themselves.”

 

I sat there for awhile enjoying the moment. I thanked Him for his time and for all that He has done for me and my family, and He replied, “Anytime. I’m here 24 hours a day. All you have to do is ask for me, and I’ll answer.”

Photo Source

Posted in Blogging

A Blog Worth Sharing #7- Gilmours Nice Place

Hello Everyone! 🙂

Today, I am very excited to share with you one of my favorite blogs. I like that the style is different from the usual blogs that I read. It is artistic, intelligent, and funny too! 🙂 I strongly recommend that you visit and read this blog.

It is about “observations of modern day life observed through the eyes of two cats and a human.” I really enjoy this blog and I hope that you’d feel the same.

Thank you Allan Gilmour for your creativity and wit! You’re simply amazing!

Gilmours-Nice-Place.JPG

BLOG NAME: Gilmours Nice Place

POSTS TITLE:
How to stop complaining, grumbling, and, moaning

“Mr Midnight had started  wearing a purple latex band around one of his legs and he was now proudly parading around the garden so that Sir Winston could see it.

SW-Avatar       What have you got tied to your leg Mr Midnight? It looks quite funny.

MM-Avatar       It´s a new therapy I´m practicing…”
Losing Control

 “MM-AvatarI´m glad that I´m a cat this time round daddy and not a human being.

author-Avatar       And why is that Mr Midnight?  Can you remember a disturbing event from one of your past lives or something?

MM-Avatar       Not really. I sometimes have strange flashbacks burning my brain but that could also have something to do with the fact that I haven´t drank enough fluids.

I don´t need to travel back to one of my past lives to be thankful that I´m a cat.

You human beings always remind me how good I´ve got it.”

 

(Featured Image: Source)

Posted in Motivational, Positive Thinking

Why We Should Not Settle

Some of us want so much more in life- we want more money. We want a bigger house. We want to a better job. We want to have more time with loved ones. We want to have more time to do the things that we’re passionate about. BUT WE SETTLE WITH WHAT WE ALREADY HAVE.

Why? Probably because we are afraid of the unknown- we do not know for sure what’s going to happen when we take risks- we might even lose what we already have. OR possibly because we’re afraid to fail. Why suffer the blow of failure and hurt our self-esteem, right? OR perhaps we’re thinking, why ask for more when “this” is already working? OR maybe we have simply won in making ourselves believe that it is impossible to dream big and realize it.

I tell you what- the world offers abundance of possibilities and God wants you to have those. 

“And God will generously provide all you need. Then you will always have everything you need and plenty left over to share with others.” (2 Corinthians 9:8)

Sadly, not many people is are able to enjoy these possibilities because some of us are not courageous enough to try and seek out our dreams. Only the people with enough courage, and only those who are not afraid to take risks, get to experience these possibilities. Only the people who get out of their comfort zones and are willing to embrace failures will experience more success and happiness. You will never know how much you can get from this world if you do not dream and work hard for your dream.

If you are not satisfied with your life now, it is time to create your new story and start living it. No one else is holding you back but yourself.

  • Don’t focus on what you do not have. Focus on what you have and work on that. Master your gift to unleash your potential, and you’ll be amaze to find out how much you can do.
  • Use people. Ask help from those who have been there. Get assistance from people who are expert on the field. Get yourself a good mentor who inspires you. Whether you like it or not, you will need the help of others.
  • Make time to do that one thing that you love. One day you might wake up and realize it may be too late for you to pursue your dream or passion.
  • Don’t be afraid to fail. As Paulo Coelho so aptly wrote, “When you find your path, you must not be afraid. You need to have sufficient courage to make mistakes. Disappointment, defeat, and despair are the tools God uses to show us the way.”
  • Listen to your heart. I love how Steve Jobs put it, “Don’t let the noise of other opinions drown your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition, they somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.” I could not agree more.

Remember, you are the author of your own life. You can always change your story. You are the driver of your life. You can always change your route. Your future depends solely on the decisions and actions that you make now.

Photo Source

Posted in Inspirational, Positive Thinking

Be an Inverse Paranoid!

“…and I think to myself, what a wonderful world!”- Louis Armstrong

A paranoid person is someone who feels extremely nervous, always fearful and worried because he believes that other people do not like him. He believes that people will only hurt him, take advantage of him and put him down. He sees the world is plotting to do him harm.

An Inverse Paranoid on the other hand is someone who believes that the world is conspiring to do him good. He believes that the world is full of goodness! That people are supportive and loving. He believes that bad things are disguised opportunities. He believes that challenges are there to enrich him and make him a better person.

Happy People are optimistic and grateful people. If you want to be happy, be an Inverse Paranoid and start focusing on the blessings in life! 🙂

Note: If you want to know more about the Inverse Paranoid, read The Success Principles by Jack Canfield.

(photo source)


Date Written: August 14, 2016

Posted in Inspirational, Life & Wellness, Positive Thinking, Psychology

Live Light. Live Mighty.

Today, I want to share with you 2 great life lessons that I personally believe would make a difference in the way we view life and the world around us, IF only we live by them.

Lesson #1: FORGIVE YOURSELF AND FORGIVE OTHERS

“Forgiveness is the best form of love. It takes a strong person to say sorry, and an even stronger person to forgive.”- Anonymous

Forgive yourself for the wrong choices and decisions you’ve made,  for not being good enough, for not being open, for not trying harder, for not reaching out. Forgive yourself for your failures and for the things that you did not do.

Forgive others for hurting you, for not appreciating you, for taking advantage of you, and for the wrong things done to you.

Not many people realize that when we forgive, we do ourselves favor. Forgiveness liberates us from the negative emotions that consume us. It frees us from anger, hatred and regrets. Forgiveness gives us peace and enables us to move forward.

 

Lesson #2: SEEK SIGNIFICANCE, NOT MATERIAL WEALTH

“Do the things that come from the heart. When you do, you won’t be dissatisfied…”– Mitch Albom, Tuesdays with Morrie.
When we die, we cannot bring our wealth with us. Our fame will eventually be forgotten. Our achievements will soon mean nothing. But what we will be remembered for are the things that we did to and for other people. How we made them feel. How we gave a part of ourselves to them.

So invest in people. Share your time. Be concern and compassionate. Nourish and dig deeper your relationships with your friends and family. Make it your purpose to share what you can give to the people around you.

I have not experienced dying, but I know that I would go happy and peacefully when I will have people who loves me in my deathbed. I would not trade that to any treasure in the world.
Choose LOVE over hate.
Choose KINDNESS over greed.
Choose FORGIVENESS over hatred.
Choose to be HAPPY by making the world around you happy. 🙂

(photo source)


Date Written: June 16, 2016

Posted in Life & Wellness, Motivational, Positive Thinking, Psychology

3 Steps to End LONELINESS

When we have a problem and feel as though our life is falling apart, our tendency is to “escape” from the miserable state that we’re at- and most often than not, we resolve to the quick fixes that are also self-destructive at some point: We drink. We party like hell in the company of people who more or less do not care about what’s going on with your life. We take drugs to forget or have sex with strangers. But guess what– the next day, YOUR PROBLEM IS STILL THERE because these quick fixes are not really the solutions but a temporary escape from your reality.

Just recently, I was able to listen attentively to Jason Mraz’ song “Three Things” and I thought, Wow! This is exactly how we should deal with the downsides in our lives.

 

“Number one, I cry my eyes out and dry up my heart.”

cry

Yes, crying is a cathartic release. It purges us of our massive feeling of loneliness. I personally believe that it is important to first empty ourselves with the heartaches before we could move on.

 

“The second thing I do… say my thank-you’s for each and every moment of my life. I go where I know the love is and let it fill me up inside…”

Not many of us realize but it is also important to contemplate on our lives. We get to analyze what went well and what went wrong…being said that, we should not fix our focus only the to the bad experience and the bad feeling that it brings- but more importantly, what lesson do we get from it.

friendsSurrounding ourselves with the people who cares for us also helps us get through the difficulties of life. If we are alone and we are lonely, we get lonelier because we do not have another person to encourage us and share the burden. Other people may not necessarily provide the solutions, but they give us the emotional support that is much needed. They strengthen us by letting us feel loved and valued.

 

“The third thing that I do…I pause, I take a breath,…and I let that chapter end.”

pastWe should let go of the failures and hurts in our past, and move on with our lives. Contrary to what others believe in, your past do not determine your future. You future is determined by the choices that you make…and it is your choice to be happy. SO CHOOSE TO BE HAPPY.

 

(Photo credits: Google, Video credits: YouTube)


Date Written: May 30, 2016

Posted in Happy Story, Personal

A Happy Story #3-I Hate Her No More…

Sharer: Benjamin – Project Believe in Yourself

Hello Everyone,

Our sharer today is a good buddy of mine from PBIY (Project Believe In Yourself). I actually asked him to share after watching  his YouTube video. I hope that you’ll find inspiration from his story. 🙂

Thank you Benjamin for sharing with us your story. I wish only the best for your projects! 

Hey Champs! Hope you’re doing good!

This will be a summarized story, of my experience in a relationship of 6 years (4 officially, with 2 years of friendship before getting together) with my ex-gf, who’s also my first love (I was hers too, aww ain’t that sweet? XD) and before I go on, I just want to make one thing clear:

Things may have ended badly between us but I sincerely, wholeheartedly, do not hate her for leaving me and making me go through the things I did. Not anymore.

Some of you may think I’m a dumbass for this (Hell, even I do think that I am lol!) but instead of hating her, I actually feel gratitude towards her.

Why? Simply because she taught and showed me the concept of love (Romantically) and even what’s it like to be truly in love with someone.

She taught me what love can be in the form of affection and attention which you’d only see in TV, movies and fairy tales.
She even gave me the experiences which I’ve never known anyone to have gone through before as well. Needless to say, I know I did the same for her.
We shared lots of moments when we told each other we couldn’t believe we’re actually together. Btw, it was a Long Distance Relationship. I’m from Asia and she’s from Europe. Anyway-

We both had our good and bad sides but if you take away the fights we had?
We were perfect for each other like literally, we shared so many common interests, perspectives in life, moral stands and we both even shared the same idea of only having just one partner in life and then getting together and settling down.
Just be each other’s only one. How sweet was that, right? 😉

When we were both together, in the years back then- Yes, we may have fights and all but seriously, which couple don’t fight?
Besides, I had some of the happiest days in my life and that statement stays true even today. So I just want you, or her, if she has somehow managed to find this article- to know that I don’t hate her no more. I used to but not anymore. Instead-

I love her for the time and love she’s given me during the years we were together. I loved giving her all my affection, time and efforts in making her feel like the happiest girl alive.

I wholeheartedly love all the lessons and adventures we’ve been through together.
They were fantabulous. I thank her for taking up my offer to come into my world when I told her to (I didn’t ask her to be my gf then, I told her to be and she said yes lol! Isn’t she an amazing gal? XD- P.S. I’m amazing for suggesting it too).

It was an absolutely magical carpet ride- A whole new world for us both and like in a Disney movie, truly out of the world. (Got the reference? High-5!)

Our life experiences together were one of a kind. (Which I’m sure, you and your special one is too)

Funny thing is, there’s this song by Green Day (One of my FAVORITE Rock Band) which I’ve always loved the melody to but never truly understood the lyrics nor why Billie Joe (The Vocalist) was so teared up while playing this song live (In the show I saw on video)-  Until I’ve experienced my own break up and accidentally playing it while going through my old song library on iTunes and let it play till it finished.
I’ve always enjoyed the song with a smile because of the melody while listening but this time, something else happened.

It got me tearing up like Billie Joe. The melody and lyrics hit me hard like a train, pulling all sorts of emotions out of me as I started reliving the beautiful past that I know, will never ever come back nor be reliving ever again.

You might’ve heard of this one as well. It’s called “Good Riddance (Time of Your Life)”.

Listen to the song here –> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_bTdLi0YUVM

This song to me, its mainly written over the loss of a lover in your life.

Billie Joe wrote it during the period when his girlfriend at the time was leaving him but when we really look at the lyrics, somehow you see that it’s about life in general and everything that’s in it. Not just relationships.

When I heard the song after the fateful break up, that’s when I realize that this song is filled with lines of everlasting wisdom.

“Another turning point, a fork stuck in the road. Time grabs you by the wrist, directs you where to go.”

There will be times when we reach a point in our life where we’re stuck- like a fork in the road, unsure where to go nor what to do next. This might also be the moment when you just stay stuck until time drags you along somewhere. You are not alone, we all go through this one, champ. Stay strong.

“So make the best of this test and don’t ask why.”

I’m sure you can relate already. When we go through an extremely dark period of our life, we often ask ourselves and everyone around us, perhaps even God “Why did this happen? Why is this happening to me?”

But we never get the answer because “It’s not a question but a lesson learned in time.”

There are things in life which we’ll only get the answers to as we live and gain experience with time. When something like this happens, we don’t ask “Why” but just learn from it because the knowledge we gain from it will be for life and it can be used for a bigger purpose such as changing someone else’s life for the better. But ultimately, we must never forget that it can be used to change our own life for the better.

“So take the photographs and still frames in your mind, hang it on a shelf in good health and good time.”
“Tattoos of memories and dead skin on trial. For what it’s worth, it was worth all the while.”

What I’ve been saying. Memories are something we need to hold onto not only because they are precious moments of your life, but also because they can get you through a lot of things in life and make you realize that “For what it’s worth it was worth all the while.”

You’ve gained so much from them and they are forever yours to keep and reflect upon whenever you need or wish to!

In the end, life itself “It’s something unpredictable but in the end is right.”

There are times when we can control it, there times we can’t. In the end, no matter what happens, it’ll be alright. After the curtain falls, when everything is all over?

“I hope you had the time of your life.”

We all had fun, we’ve suffered through thick and thin together, conquering obstacles and life challenges that came our way and it all ends here and I want you to know now- I’ve had the time of my life doing all those things, experiencing life with you.

So again, thank you, my dear ex-sweetheart. I’m honestly writing this with a smile (Albeit, a bitter sweet feeling in my heart!). If you are reading this, I want you to know that I will never forget you. And I hope you had the time of your life with me and are still having a blast in life right now 😉

If you have recently gone through a heartbreak yourself, or are still trying to get over someone or seeking closure- Understand that you will only find peace after you’re able to see a life ahead without the person who’s leaving you or have left you, being a part of it.

Seems impossible but know that life isn’t over with this person gone. In fact, it’s just the beginning!

I know (SHE was MY LIFE so yeah, I know lol!), it’s hard to see and envision a future like that but in time, and with SUPPORT– You will be walking on the path towards your next chapter in life and it WILL be a brighter and happier chapter in your life’s story 😉

I was there. I had so much negative feelings towards her back then when the breakup happened. I hated her then.
But when I realized that the reason to why I hated her so much- Was because I loved her so much? I started asking myself if I’m being fair to her and myself? Was I being fair to our relationship?

Why did I choose to take away all the beautiful moments we shared together?

Just because she’s leaving, I’m going to convince myself to live my life as if we’ve never met and the past which we’ve spent our lives together- It never happened? And I didn’t learn nor gain anything from it?

Well I can do that- IT WAS what I was doing, which obviously isn’t very healthy for me lol.

OR-

I can instead, cherish everything that we did. Everything that we had.
Everything we gave to each other and accept the fact that even though we won’t be getting anything more from each other, we will forever be keeping whatever we’ve given to each other. She gave me all her love just as how I gave her all of mine.

She may be gone and will not be giving any more but it’s okayIt’s okay.

Just like how my friends’ and families’ love that’s being invested in me, her love and mine? It’s all in both our hearts and memories now. And really, that’s okay.

I actually thought of burning all the letters etc she’s given me (Quite a number. LDR, remember?) but in the end, I decided not to because she was a part of my life. I loved that part of my life. I loved her. So much. Okay tearing up lol but it’s all good my friend.

It’s just the moment. Who knows? Perhaps one day I might really have to burn it all because I need to make space for more letters or something in future lol!

There’s so much more into the story but I shall end it here. I sincerely hope you’ve enjoyed reading this and actually learned something from it!

Seriously, I hate you and Nina for making me go through this walk down memory lane (Lol just kidding haha!) but I think stories like this- It’s good for the soul. Both yours and mine 😉

Okay so before I get going, I just wanna say that if you’re currently going through a difficult time in your life and feel that you need someone to talk to?
You can always email me via doubleyourpresence@gmail.com and share it with me.
I’d love to listen to what you have to talk about.
As I recently started telling ppl on WP these days
“Listening, can do wonders for a damaged soul. Even heal them.”
So share if you feel the need to!

Alternatively, if you want to find similar people such as yourself (Or me lol), with a genuine and sincere heart of helping?
Feel free to check out my blog for our Project BIY and learn more about our mission in making a positive difference in life! If you wish to contribute as well, definitely check in with us!

We’re a new community that’s aiming bring the beautiful side of the human spirit to the world and we’d love to have you join us if you do share our mission and vision of a better world 😉

We got a new forum that’s currently still in it’s testing phase (During the time this article is written anyway) and we’d be excited to have you join in the test if you are keen to as well!
Head on over to meet everyone who’s helping with the test over there!
We got a chatroom installed at the bottom of the forum too 😉

Let the kind souls unite and may you keep rocking your world!

Photo Source


Did you miss the previous stories? Check them here.                                                                  Inspire someone by sharing your happy story! Here’s how to submit.

Posted in Positive Thinking, Relationships

What I do to Make Someone Else’s Day

“Happiness is a by product of an effort to make someone else happy.”
– Gretta Brooker Palmer

It is not everyday that we feel great…most of the time, we’re just good, especially when there is really nothing special going on in our lives. But I’m a believer that someone can always make our day a little brighter in their own little ways.

As for me, here’s what I do to brighten someone else’s day:

  •  I ask how they are. When I get “I’m fine” as an answer, I follow-up with…what can we do to make the “fine” turn into “great”? 🙂
  • I send “Thank You” messages for something that they did that I truly appreciated, or for their simply being awesome. I make sure I tell what I am thanking them for…and when I am really in a great mood, I treat them with coffee or donut (surprise!!!)
  • I compliment with sincerity. This instantly put a smile on other people’s faces.

How about you? What do you do to make someone else’s day?
Or how can someone make your day?

make-someone-happy

happy-flower

 

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