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I believe in Happy Endings

I have been married to my husband for 8 years and just like many wives, I too wish to have a lasting marriage.

However, I will admit to you that there were times when I thought that I made a mistake in choosing the right husband for me. There were times when I hated him more than I love him. There were times when I thought about leaving him because I didn’t feel loved and appreciated… but I THANK GOD THAT I DID NOT.

So, is there really a “lived happily ever after” when two lovers get married?

I know 8 years of being married is not long enough to be such an expert person in the subject matter of relationship and love- and I must admit, I am always learning. But please let me share with you what I have learned on how to make relationships work and I hope that these would be helpful to you too.

1. Once the feeling of being-in love is gone, real love begins.

What do I mean with this? After the period of cheesy, mushy, heavenly feeling of falling and feeling in love with someone, you will start to see the things that you do not necessarily like with the other person.

The girlfriend you appreciated for looking good when you go out on a date is now the annoying wife who takes hours in the bathroom to get herself fixed.

The boyfriend you were proud of for being smart and dependable is now the irritating husband who always nags when he sees something that is out of tune.

I believe this true to every relationship. After the heightened emotion of being in-love is over, we get back to reality. And the reality is that you and your partner are not perfect. But we need to accept this fact, otherwise, we only jump from one relationship to another. And so we need to decide and commit to stay in love.

I realize that Love is not a feeling, but rather, Love is hard work. When I come to accept this, it became easier for me to deal and worked on the imperfections of our relationship.

2. You need to discover the love language of your partner to be able to show love.

This is probably the biggest relationship-changer for me. You see, I was like other people. I thought that the way I want to be loved is also how my husband want to be loved. Was I ever so wrong in my life.

According to Dr. Gary Chapman, there are 5 Languages of Love. These 5 languages are different ways to show love to a person, and each person has their own primary love language- the way for them to feel that they are loved.

The 5 languages of love are:
1. Words of Affirmation
2. Quality Time
3. Receiving Gifts
4. Acts of Service
5. Physical Touch

A person who has Words of Affirmation as love language will feel very much loved when he is always told “I love You”, “I appreciate what you do”, “You’re doing a great Job!”, “I love how you did this…”, “Thank you for doing this..”

A person who has Quality Time as language of love may appreciate these words of affirmation, but may not necessarily feel loved when his spouse is not spending time talking to him, or when they aren’t going out on a date. He feels much more loved when he is in the company of his loved one with undivided attention.

You see,  for years  I and my husband have been showing love in the wrong language. I didn’t know that his love language is “Acts of Service” and he didn’t know that mine is “Quality Time”.

Since I go to work, I leave most of the house chore to our helper so I could spend more time taking care of our daughter when I’m at home. I didn’t know that I could show my husband that I love him if I just make him his coffee, prepare his meals, or trim his nails (now please don’t judge, I have a different love language!) I did little act of service for him. I could just imagine how little love he must have felt from me.

At the same time, I didn’t feel that much appreciated and loved too since we seldom go on dates- just the two of us. We always go out as a whole family. We go out of town to visit relatives or be with friends, but not alone together as couple. He showed love thru the language he knows- he washes the dishes when the helper is not around, he fixes our bed, he pays the bills- but all these things didn’t speak love to me. Perhaps now you see the disaster! We both love each other and express it in ways that do not speak love to us!

I shared this discovery to my husband and we made adjustments almost instantly. Now we feel much more loved by each other and we are happier definitely! 🙂

3. Love is a choice.
We are humans and we make mistakes. Our partners may do or say things that hurt us. We may fall short of expectations. We may disappoint one another. And we may even hate each other sometimes. But we always have a choice. We can choose to forgive and move on or dwell in past failures and allow hurt to continue to wound us. We can choose to listen and see things in our partners’ perspectives to be able to understand, or refuse to seek understanding. We may choose to stick thru thick and thin, or leave when the going gets tough.

I choose LOVE. I choose to love my imperfect husband like he chooses to love his imperfect wife. I will choose to always forgive him. I will choose to always have hope for him. Just like Jesus loves and forgives us. Together we will do our best to make sure that our marriage will have the “Happily Ever After” ending.

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Why Falling In Love is Not Real Love

If I were to be asked the best thing that could happen to a person, my answer would be to feel loved. I bet many of us have enjoyed the experience of falling in love. But what if I tell you falling in love is not real love ?

Before I tell you why. Let us see what Falling In Love is…

  • Falling in love comes naturally.

You see the other person, you get attracted- you heart beats fast, you can think of nothing else but him or her. You’ve got butterflies on your stomach. You’re on cloud-nine whenever you’re together. You don’t decide when and to whom. You just feel it. Sometimes we even fall in love to the person we least expect to fall in love with. Moreover, you also cannot force your self to fall in love. No matter how much you want, you cannot just make it happen.

  • Falling in love is effortless.

Whatever we do when we fall in love is not difficult to do. Sometimes, we spend money on dates, but it’s okay as long as we’re having dinner with our beloved. We fly to the other side of the world, but it’s okay as long as we could be with our partner even if it’s only for a few hours. You may skip basketball games with your peers because you have to go with her on a tree planting activity. OR you will pass on salon day with your best friend because you will watch him play baseball. ALL these things will be effortless. It doesn’t require much will-power.

  • Falling in love is finding your perfect match, and feeling in love forever.

You finally meet the perfect guy or girl who completes you. He/she is everything you’re looking for in a partner. You just know the he/she is THE ONE for you. You will never look at another person again.

Falling in love is an experience of temporary emotional high. It will not last long enough to sustain a happy relationship.

LOVE will. So, if falling in love is not real love. What is Real LOVE?

As a matter of fact, Real Love requires what is not present in falling in love.

  • Real Love requires Decision.

Sometimes, we hate the person we love but does it mean we stop loving them? No. You still make coffee for your husband in the morning even if you’re mad at him for not mowing the lawn. You still drive your wife to work even if you’re pissed because she forgot to pay the electric bill. Love is a Choice.

  • Real Love requires Effort.

Sometimes, we don’t want to do things but because we love, we exert effort and still do them.

A tired and sleepy mom would still wake up in the middle to the night to feed their baby. A father who worked overnight will still wake up very early in the morning to drive the children in school. You don’t know how to cook but your spouse loves home-cooked meal so you learn the art of cooking and be the best food engineer! That is love.

  • Real Love requires Commitment.

The person you love may hurt you, annoy you, make you angry, make you jealous, belittle you, or disrespect you…but if you’re committed, you will always remind your self to love them in spite and despite of. Does it mean you have to just take in and tolerate the negatives? Nope… there is a thing called Tough Love!

In addition, there will always be a time when you will find another person who is better than your spouse or partner in one or more criteria. Again, we have to remind ourselves to be committed & choose to stay in our relationships.

LOVE works with Hard Work in order to survive obstacles. Loving is simple BUT it is not always easy. Nonetheless, the reward is always worth 10 times more the effort! 🙂

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Life is good when there is Love

“Where there is Love, there is Life”- Mahatma Ghandi

There are many things in life that I simply love.

I love reading a good book… I love listening to soothing music… I love coloring my book… I love drinking coffee… I love cooking for my family… I love my movie dates and dinners with hubby… I love stargazing and cloud-watching with my daughter… I love hugs and flowers… I love going out of town…I love a lot more other things…

BUT I made a discovery and found out another thing that I love which for is really sweet and gives me so much more satisfaction. It is something that really melts my heart and you would not guess what it is.

I love combing my mom’s hair.

Yes, it’s downright simple happiness for me.

As I gently comb my mom’s hair, I feel nothing but great love and respect for her. I know more than 30 years ago, she was the one combing my hair with such great care.

My mom loves me and my 3 other siblings very much and I know she does up until now that we have our own family. Her love and care for us never ceased. In fact, she also shows the same affection to her grandkids and treat our spouses like her own children.

So every time I do an act of service for her, my heart delights on it- every second of it!

Whenever we get the chance to be together as family, I realize how my mom and my dad are also getting older… That’s a reality that I can do nothing about. I can’t freeze time and wish that we could all just stay as we are at this present time. No- that is impossible. BUT LIFE IS GOOD.

Life is good because we have a technology that allow us to see each other as if we’re in the same place. Everyday they get to see their grandkids grow up. No matter the distance, we can be there for each other when we need to. We do not feel that we’re alone.

Life is good simply because every day is an opportunity to make people in our lives happy. Every day, I get the chance to tell them that I love them. Life is good because there is LOVE.

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A Blog Worth Sharing #10: ORDINARILYEXTRAORDINARYMOM

Hello Everyone!

Today, I am excited to share with you a blog that I really love. As a working mom, I could definitely relate to most of the post of Brittany Bonnaffons, the Extraordinarily Ordinary Mom!

I like how she shares her personal experience about life and the realizations that she makes. Adding to that the pictures of her super cute kids! I feel blessed and inspired whenever I read her posts. I hope you will find time to visit her blog- I promise you will not regret! 🙂

Thank you Britanny for inspiring us in your awesome way!

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BLOG NAME: ORDINARILY EXTRAORDINARY MOM

POST TITLE: WHY I STOPPED TALKING ABOUT WORK AT HOME

“No matter whether you love or hate your job, a job is just that – a job.  It need only be a piece of who you are not the entire picture.  I laugh to myself as I hear God saying, “Brittany, you had only one job!…You had ONE JOB!”  And it had nothing to do with work.  “Give your day to Me.  Trust that I can make the most of it.”  So I do.”

POST TITLE: WHY WE CAN ALL USE A RESOLUTION

“And today I got angry with God.  This time my anger had nothing to do with me.  I was angry for my son.  He could not tell me what color the cup was.  At least twenty times I asked him.  At least twenty times I told him the cup was purple.  At least twenty times, he could not tell me what color the cup was five minutes later, or two minutes later, or one minute later.  Somewhere, in the middle of dinner, I started shouting at God in my mind.  “Goodness gracious.  Just tell him what color the cup is!!!  Why is this fair? Why can’t he remember?  I just asked him.  Please help him remember what color the cup is.””

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Don’t say it…Show it.

Love is not just a word. And it is also not just a feeling. No.
It is definitely more that that. Love is Action, Service and Commitment.

This video I am sharing with you today shows perfectly what real love is all about. I hope you’ll find inspiration on watching this. 🙂

 

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(video taken from YouTube)

 

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Happiness…want some?

“RULES FOR HAPPINESS: Something to do, someone to love, something to hope for.”- Immanuel Kant

I love Immanuel Kants’ Rules for Happiness. I agree with him 100%. According to him, people are happy when they have these 3 things:
1. Something to Do.

Whenever my mom comes to visit us (my family or my sisters’), she is always “on the move”. She cooks for us, she feeds my daughter, she does whatever household chore she could do in our home and I don’t stop her- okay, I help her instead :). Why do I allow her to do the things she does? Because it makes her happy to do so.

The reason is obvious. When we have something to do, we have a purpose. It gives us the feeling that we are useful and needed. It gives us a sense of fulfillment.

2. Someone to Love.

Show me a person in a healthy loving relationship and I’ll show you a happy person. Show me someone who lives selfishly alone and I’ll show you one miserable being.

Everybody needs to love and be loved. That is how we are designed by our Creator. The fish is designed to live in the water- take it from the water and it dies. A bird is designed to fly in the air. Put it in the water and it dies. When God created man, He said that “it is not good for man to be alone.” (Genesis 2:18). We are designed to be with someone to share the gift of love. Take love away from us and we die too.

3. Something to Hope for.

If we have something to look forward to everyday, it excites us. For some, it gives them a sense of direction in life- a goal to strive for.

It is lonely when life is just a pattern of “waking up- eating- going to work- going home- sleeping”… Surely there must be something more about life that we could hope for.

So my dear friends, if you want to live happier, you know what to look for. They are definitely out there somewhere for us to discover! 🙂

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L.O.V.E.

Hello Everyone!

It’s February- the Love Month!
Hopefully, topics about LOVE will not appear to be cheesy and corny at this time (crossing my fingers!).

Well, I wish to still be able to deliver interesting posts to you, my dear readers, even if I intend to focus more on the subject of love this month.

For today, I want to share with you a short conversation I had with my (then 4-yr old) daughter some time ago on love…

Gaby: Mommy, you love Papa.
Me: Ah-huh…
Gaby: Yes, because you married each other (her index finger pointing to our wedding photo). So you love him.
Me: Okay…
Gaby: Mommy, love is when your hearts are together.

I don’t know how my daughter came up with her smart definition but I would agree. Love is not something that we keep to ourselves- it is meant to be shared with someone else. It’s loving others and allowing them to love you back. It is indeed a sense of “togetherness.”

How about you? I would love to know what the word means to you. 🙂

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Relationship Drifts

“The best thing to hold onto in life is each other.”- Audrey Hepburn

When we talk about broken or failed relationships, what comes to mind first is that someone probably cheated. And then there are the other reasons such as incompatibility or irreconcilable differences; physical or verbal abuse; possessiveness, jealousy, & trust-issues that lead to fighting, etc.

But I tell you what, there is another MAJOR culprit why relationships fail. I would bet that this one probably have not cross the minds of most of us because unlike the reasons mentioned earlier, this particular one is not obvious. It works like a cancer- you’ll only realize that you have it when you’re already experiencing the damage on the relationship. Most often than not, either it is too late, or it will require a “major treatment” for the relationship to be restored.

This silent relationship-killer I am talking about is called Relationship Drift. It is like people staying on different boats that are slowly being drifted away by the water current. If they don’t exert effort to paddle and stay close together, the boats will be separated away from each other.

The sad thing is that Relationship Drifts don’t just happen overnight. It’s a long on-going process that we fail to notice and it could happen to any relationship. It could be between spouses, parents and children, in-laws, and friends. It’s when we lose spark or interest to one another. This is when conversations are no longer interesting or on a deeper level. It is when we no longer miss the other person. It is when we no longer care what the other person is doing. It is when we no longer care what they think or feel about us. It is when we no longer feel anything or when we become indifferent.

I would like to think that drifts in relationships is brought about by the absence of 3-A’s: Affection, Attention, and Affirmation. And so to avoid it, we need to ensure that we always have these 3-A’s present in our relationships.

  • Affection.
    When we love someone, we have to show them our affection. Love is not just a word or a feeling. There has to be an action. Kissing and hugging are most popular, but there are other ways too. We can give simple gifts, tap on the shoulder, helping out, or even calling or texting just to say you’re thinking of the person or you appreciate something that he or she did for you.
  • Attention.
    Set a time to bond. Try to schedule separate dates with your spouses or partner, children, in-laws and friends. Be mindful of the moment and communicate. Share your thoughts and experiences. Ask how each other is doing, and be interested to not only what’s happening in their lives, but also with their dreams and aspirations. Celebrate a lot- not just birthdays and holidays. Make reasons for celebrations like when your son top the exam or your daughter learned to play a new instrument. Creating moments with your loved ones is what makes a great relationship.
  • Affirmation.
    We need to show encouragement and support when needed. Even if we don’t feel like doing it, we have to let people feel and believe that we will always be here for them. The lack of assurance that you will be there no matter what cripples relationships. Being said that, let’s try hard not to judge but be understanding even if we do not tolerate a certain behavior. Good and open communication is always a key.

I know that doing all these is not easy. It is hard and that is why most relationships don’t work out. Trust me when I say that it is better to work hard now, than suffer and regret the consequences of not having to do all these later.

Happy weekend everybody! May God bless the relationships in your lives!

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A Blog Worth Sharing- #9: BOSS in the Middle

Hello Everyone!

I am sharing with you today another great blog that I really admire.

Boss in the Middle focuses on “people who are responsible for understanding, shaping, and promoting the vision of “upper management” and infusing that vision into a workforce.”
It contains very good articles on Leadership, Problem-Solving, and People-Management. But what I love about this blog is how faith in God is incorporated.

I highly encourage you to visit. I’m 101% sure that you’ll have something to take away from this blog. 🙂

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BLOG NAME: >BOSS< in the Middle

POST TITLE: Real Leaders Pray

“For leaders, prayer is not just a meditation technique, that when utilized properly, can calm your heart rate and put you in a tranquil state. No. Prayer is direct communication with the Most High God. The Creator of heaven and earth has given us His undivided attention and we can call Him anytime. It is as vital for a leader to understand the importance of prayer, before, during and after tasks. If we talk to God up front and ensure our motives are clear, He will see you through according to His will…”

POST TITLE: Leaders must say NO when Necessary

“A new leader might think, “It would be great if I could give my team everything they desire.” Higher compensation, benefits, resources, information, the list goes on. But a good leader understands, not only is that impossible, it could also be detrimental…”

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What Do You See?

Hello Everyone!

Today, I have a story to share with you and I am hoping that it will put a sunshine on your day. 🙂

One time, Elsa and Ana are talking over lunch. Ana is venting out her frustrations to her friend saying that nothing is going right in her life. Everything is wrong…everything is horrible and terrible.

Elsa, trying to counsel and make her friend realize that her life is not at all that bad, brought out a piece of paper and a pen. She asked Ana to divide the paper and write all the bad things on the left side, and on the right side, she should write all the good things.

Ana: Oh I’m pretty sure that I will have longer list on the left side.

Elsa: Okay, well…we’ll see about that. Let’s start… How about you write on the bad things- “my husband is cheating on me.”

Ana: No way! I am 200% sure that my husband is loyal and faithful to me. He comes right home after work, we date every Saturday, and he spends time with our children whenever he’s available.

Elsa: Alright, I guess that’s a good thing then. So we can write that on the right side of the paper. Next one, write on the bad things- “My children are on drugs.”

Ana: That is sooo not true! My children do not even drink or smoke. They are very serious with their studies and they have cool but decent set of friends.

Elsa:  Another good thing then, I supposed. How about you write there- ” I am terminally ill and I’m dying weeks from now.”

Ana: I do not have a terminal disease, and I supposed will never have. I practice healthy living.

Elsa: Ok, how about…”I don’t have any friends”,or “I’m bankrupt,” or “I don’t have a job”, or “My house is being foreclosed” or “I can’t buy my family food.”. or “My children hates me”, “My in-laws don’t like me”, “My dog don’t like me”…

Realizing what her friend is trying to do, tears rolled down Ana’s eyes and she hugged Elsa and whispered “Thank you.”

My friends, if you’re having a bad mood, or bad day or bad week… shift your focus. Get yourself out of that box of negatives and look out for the things that are going right in your life. You will see that life ain’t that bad at all!

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What’s your “I am”?

“Whether you realize it or not, all through the day the power of “I AM” is at work in your life, for what follows those 2 simple words will determine what kind of life you live.”- Joel Osteen, The Power of I AM

Many of us wish that we are more successful, more beautiful, happier with our relationships, more loved…We wish for more of the good things. We want better and yet oftentimes, we tell ourselves these- “I’m never gonna be good enough..”, “I’m not that smart to be qualified…”, “I don’t think I can do it…”. “I’m too old to be doing this now…”, “I’m too weak for this…”, “I’m always unlucky…”, “This is my fate…”, “I’m a hopeless case…”,”I’m born this way. I’ll never change..”

Can I tell you a secret? YOU ARE WHO YOU SAY YOU ARE. We cannot expect to live a positive life if we’re always talking negative.

If you always tell yourself that you’re never be good enough, then you will never be good enough. If you tell yourself you’re inferior or you’re not smart, then you will always be inferior. If you tell yourself that you’re weak, then you’ll always going to be weak.If you tell yourself you’re unworthy of being loved, then you will never feel loved.

Stop cursing your life and start inviting the positives,. Say “I am able.”, “I am lovable”, “I am blessed.”, “I am lucky”, “I am a blessing to people”, “I am beautiful”, “I am smart”, “I am healthy”, “I am wealthy”, “I am strong”, “I am confident”. Love, Blessings, Health, Wealth, Brilliance, Cleverness, Ability, & Talent will come looking for you.

If you don’t like what you’re seeing, start sowing different seeds. It’s time you start saying the right “I AM” and follow-through with your actions! 🙂

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Have a fruitful week everyone! 🙂

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My First for 2017 =)

I’m excited to receive my very first blog award for this year.  Thank you Andrei for nominating TheHappyLife101 for the  One Lovely Blog Award. 🙂

THOUGHT AVENUE: Speak Your Mind is one of the most sensible and thought-provoking yet humorous blog that I’ve seen. I strongly encourage everyone to visit Andrei’s blog and I guarantee that you will not be wasting your precious time.

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  1. Thank the person that nominated you and leave a link to their blog.
  2. Share 7 facts about yourself.
  3. Nominate at most 15 people.
  4. Tell your nominees the good news!

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  1. I am comfortable going out without wearing any make-up on. I’d rather spend an hour reading an interesting book, than spend an hour in front of the mirror  putting make-ups.
  2. I can cook a food that I’ve never cooked as long as I’ve tasted it- One of my many amazing talents! 😉
  3. I’m a better Writer than a Speaker. In person, I stutter a lot!
  4. I have a notebook where I write my thoughts for my daughter. She’s only 5-years old now so I could not really talk to her in a more mature way. But there are things that I want her to know from my experiences with her. So I just write them on my “Dear Gaby” notebook, and hopefully I will not lose it until she’d get to read it when she’s older. 🙂
  5. Sometimes, I use my “travel time” to the office to pray. And I do randomly pray for  strangers.
  6. I could live a day (or a week) without my cellphone with me. It’s true.
  7. I love planners. I still own an actual planner even if I could schedule upcoming events on my cellphone or Outlook. 🙂

nominations

Khadhy
Mark All My Words
A Teacher’s Reflections
Out An’ About
Flying Through Water
Cyranny’s Cove
Project Believe In Yourself

It’s great if you guys would participate, but it’s also okay if you chose not to. Just know that I find your blogs lovely and they deserve the recognition. 🙂

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A Little Sacrifice Won’t Hurt…

When I am asked to share something that I’ve learned from animals, I would always remember this story about the Hedgehogs that my Psychology instructor in college told us.

During cold winters, these tiny spiky animals would try to get as closer to each other as they could get to stay warm, but being spiky as they are, they would get hurt when they try to stay very close. And so they tried to distance themselves but they would suffer the cold, and some of them would not even survive it. Realizing that, they  chose to stay close together even if it meant getting a little hurt. They learned to accept this sacrifice because this is what would make them feel warm and it ensures their survival from the cold weather.

Like the hedgehogs, people also need others to survive in life. It’s true that we are putting  ourselves at risk of getting hurt the more that we become closer to people; but that is also what would make us feel warmer and happier. People will hurt us or we will hurt Others at some point in our lives. The arguments and fights are given. We will always have disagreements. But these are nothing compared to the happiness that close relationships give us. Being safe yet alone and lonely would be so much worse.

So like the hedgehogs, we need to accept and tolerate the little imperfections of other people. In the end, we need each other to survive in life. 🙂

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Thank you Andrei for tagging me along on the Animal Series Tag! I know it took me a while, but a promise is a promise, right? 🙂

My Nominations:

  1. Flying Through Water
  2. Out An About
  3. The Bag Lady

The Rules:

  1. Thank the person who nominated you
  2. Pick an animal and explain why they are a source of inspiration to you, and how their character can be used to motivate.
  3. Nominate at least 3 other bloggers, to share the positivity!
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It’s a Beautiful Day!

Hello Everyone!

I’ve recently discovered this song on YouTube and it’s really one beautiful, encouraging and relaxing song… I keep listening to it as it’s very soulful, and I will be too selfish if I’m not going to share it with you.

I hope you enjoy the voice of Joshua Radin as well as the melody and the message of this song…

Make your day beautiful by making someone else’s one! 🙂

(video courtesy of YouTube)

“Beautiful Day”

I’m gonna wash the dust off my soul
I’m gonna listen to some rock n’ roll
No cares, come what may
I’m making a beautiful day

I’m gonna drive my car into the sea
Swim out far cause I believe that the waves will wash the gray away
I’m making a beautiful day
But let me hear you say

Oooh ooohh my my
I’m learning to fly
Hey hey what’s that you’re saying
Lets not forget we’re alive

Gonna climb that hill behind my house
See what this place is all about
Cause from above it all
You can’t help but say
It’s gonna be a beautiful day
It’s gonna be a beautiful day
But let me hear you say

Gonna turn my enemies into friends
Was broken yet stronger when it mends
When we all come together this song will play
We’ll sing it’s a beautiful day
And it’s gonna be my beautiful day

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A Happy Story #6: People See You

Last Friday, our lead trainer at the office sent out a random exercise to help improve our vocabulary. The task was to describe 3 teammates using given alternative words to replace the common adjectives that we use.

I was surprised that someone chose to describe me, and I am happy and grateful to what he or she has written about me.

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I am very glad that I was able to affect someone and that they notice me in a positive way. I just do what I know is right without thinking how other people might judge me.

The truth is, we always have audience around us. And we always have opportunity to inspire and build them, or dishearten and discourage them.

In all honesty, if others are to describe you now (whether at home, or in your workplace, or with friends), do you think you will like what they’ll say about you? 🙂

I wish all of you a great week ahead!

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To Grow, Take Accountability

“When you think everything is someone else’s fault, you will suffer a lot. When you realize that everything springs only from yourself, you will learn both peace & joy.”- Dalai Lama

I have a work colleague who is often late in sending her reports. She hasn’t been meeting the required metrics, and she always has an alibi. It’s either she has a lot on her plate, or she needed to take care of something else that is urgent, or the workload isn’t fair, etc…Never did she once admitted that she messed up and that it is her fault for coming up short. But when there’s commendation for the account that she handles, it is all because of her.

In reality, there are really people who only want to take credit for what they do right and for the good that they experience. Everything that is pleasant about their life is because of their own doing. However, they don’t take accountability when something bad or wrong happens. They point the finger to other people or to circumstances.

If we want to grow as successful & mature individuals, we have to learn to accept accountability. We can take all the credits for all the amazing things that could happen to us for as long as we also take responsibility for the bad things that happen to us.

If we admit our mistakes, we find out our weaknesses. And If we discover our weaknesses, we know what we need to improve to better ourselves.

That is the only way for us to take full ownership of our lives.

Whether we like it or not, the fact is that we are responsible for our own experiences and what we become. It is okay to accept that sometimes, we are the problem. The real question is- what are we going to do about it? 🙂

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My One & Only Resolution

Hello everyone!

I hope that you all have a fantastic start of the new year.

I’m pretty sure that some of you have kick-started the year with your new self-resolutions. As for me, there is only one resolution that I am making for myself this year and it is TO OUTDO MYSELF.

... to be more disciplined in doing the tasks that I set myself to do, and believe that I could and will overcome my failures.
… to remember to be more helpful, kind, sensitive & patient to others than I was with them before.

My goal is to be able to answer positively these questions by the end of every week:
“HOW WAS I BETTER TO MYSELF THIS WEEK?”
“HOW WAS I BETTER IN TREATING OTHERS THIS WEEK?

and if I mess up…“WHAT CAN I DO TO BE BETTER NEXT TIME?”

I know that I will stumble along the way, but that is the very reason why I chose to have this resolution- so that I could keep trying and competing to myself until I become the better version of me.

As Simon Sinek wonderfully put it, “You are your competition…That is what ensures you find joy. Because the joy comes not from comparison but from advancement.”

I wish all of you a happy blessed new year!

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What is Christmas for me?

“The Son of God became a man to enable men to become sons of God.”- C.S. Lewis

I love Christmas…this is one of the holidays that I love because most of the time, I see smiles on people’s faces, myself included. We all love the Christmas presents, the Christmas parties, the Christmas raffles, Christmas gatherings,  Family and Friends reunion, the Christmas vacation off-work, and many more…But with all these temporary happiness and high brought about by the holiday, let us not forget the true essence of Christmas.

I would like to share with you what Christmas means to me:

1. Christmas is a reminder of God’s great Love to us.
Jesus Christ was not born in a hospital or had a fancy crib. He was born in a manger- a feed-trough for animals. It is stinky, it is rough, it is dirty, uncomfortable to be a bed, it definitely is not the place where you would want your baby to sleep. But why was the son of God born in a manger then? Because God is giving us the message that He could reach out and meet us even in our darkest place. That He wants to love us and embrace us even if we’re in the darkest point of our lives.

2. Christmas is God’s Assurance to us of our Happiness.

“But the angel said to them, “Do not be afraid. I bring you good news that will cause great joy for all the people. Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is the Messiah, the Lord.”- Luke 2:10-11

This Bible verse is telling us that God wants us to experience great joy so He gave us Jesus- to be our Savior, our Messiah, our Lord.

Happiness without God is only temporary. Your relationships, money, status, success, beauty & health- these could give you happiness but not everlasting.
If you want real and lasting joy, open your heart and life to God and start experiencing His abundant blessings.

I wish you all a Merry Blessed Christmas! 🙂

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A Blog Worth Sharing- #8: THOUGHT AVENUE: Speak Your Mind

Hello Everyone!

Today, I am excited to share with you again another blog that I find really awesome! 🙂 I can guarantee that you will not be wasting your time when you give this blog a visit because each post written is very rich in content. The Author is simply full of ideas that he expresses so eloquently in his writings.

I hope that you will enjoy Andrei’s blog as much as I do.

“Thank you Andrei for your amazing blog! It’s truly inspirational, motivational, & provocative!”

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BLOG NAME: THOUGHT AVENUE: Speak Your Mind
POST TITLE: Your Word is Your Bond

“Every time you give your word, you’re putting your honor on the line. You’re implying that others can place their trust in you because you value integrity and would never let them down. It goes without saying that if you don’t live up to your word, you may end up tarnishing your credibility, damaging your relationships, and defaming your reputation. Most importantly, you’ll be letting yourself down.”

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Keep Small Problems as they are…small.

I was on my way to work. I needed to be in the office at least an hour earlier because there was a pre-shift meeting that I had to attend to. So for the very first time, I scheduled a ride, and to my unexpected surprise it arrived 19 minutes late. Somewhere along the way, I got stuck on a heavy traffic. I felt as if I was having my own version of “series of unfortunate events”. It is as if circumstances were testing my patience. I started to feel pissed off. But I calmed myself.

Instead of feeling bad and regretting my decision in scheduling a ride, and feeling nervous and stressed out whenever I saw the heavy traffic- I chose to relax and told myself, “It’s okay.” Why? Because obviously, there is NOTHING that I could do about the situation.

HOWEVER, I can choose to do something useful for the “extra” time that the traffic seems to be giving me. So I closed my eyes and used the time to pray and just talk to God… and when I am finished and still not in my destination, I brought out my cellphone next and read articles from other blogs. I enjoyed myself reading so much that I did not even notice that we have finally arrived to my office building. And guess what? I was not late. 🙂

If I have allowed myself, I could have just stayed to be on a bad mood,feeling pissed and stressed out all throughout the travel time- which in the end would have been useless and unreasonable at all!

The next time you feel like your world is being torn apart, pause a moment and ask yourself, is it really?

Don’t let little unfortunate things ruin your beautiful day. Keep small problems as they are…small. 🙂

Have a great day everyone!

Cheers,
Nina

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Believe In Others

“As we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.” – Nelson Mandela

When I was working as a supervisor in one Telecommunications Call Center, I had a “problem agent.” He came to work late most of the time, he could not finish his 8-hours phone time within our 8-hour shift, he did not follow our QA call-flow…In short, he is the epitome of an agent that any Supervisor would not wish to have in his team.

But I did not give up on this person. In fact, I spent more time with him than I should on normal circumstances. Instead of giving him a hard time and issuing him memos, I did exactly the opposite. I told him I know that he is good and that he just have to take his job more seriously. I also often reminded him the benefits that he would get if only he would just improve his performance. During our coaching sessions, I pointed out his areas for improvement, but I also highlighted the good stuffs. Guess what happened? I was able to turn this guy around. He was really good indeed; and he was also happy when finally, he got to experience the perks of being a performer.

I was touched during one of our teambuilding when this particular guy thanked me for what I did to him. For him, it was such a big deal. But what exactly did I do? I only helped him realized that he is capable. I helped him believe in himself.

My friends, there is always someone out there in need of a “little push” who can also eventually help others if only someone would believe in them. Be that someone. Be that life-changing person. Who knows how many more will be blessed by your simple act of kindness.

I wish all of you a great weekend ahead. God bless!

Cheers,
Nina

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Happy Thoughts: PAIN & LIFE

Someday you’ll look back and see that the things you’re upset about now DO NOT REALLY MATTER…

Someday you’ll realize that all the pains you’re feeling now will be INVISIBLE…

Because THERE IS MORE TO LIFE than what you’re experiencing in the moment…

LIVE LIGHT…learn to LET GO.

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– Negative+Positive(x3)= Happy Relationship

“The single most important factor in our long-term happiness is the relationships we have with our family and close friends.”-  Clayton M. Christensen

Just recently, my 5-year old daughter and I were reviewing for her exams. She was able to pick up most of the lessons, but like any other student, she also had difficulty in understanding some, so we spent more time in learning those. However, even after more minutes of teaching and explaining, still she would not grasp them- and so I got upset and frustrated.

My frustration was very obvious. My eyes got bigger, my lips thinner, my voice got louder…yes, my daughter felt me getting angry, and it made her cry. Honestly, I felt bad too and guilty for poorly handling the situation- for not being more patient and in control of my emotion. My goodness! How “un-intelligent” my daughter must have felt when I turn into this “monster mom!”

But you know what? After our review, I made sure to tell her that I love her very much even if I get mad at her sometimes. Then I felt so much better seeing the smile back in her face.

In other circumstances, I praise her whenever she get a “star” in her workbook, or a “great  job!” marked on her hands. I make it a really BIG deal, and she would get very happy! I also recognize whenever I see her do a good things- like when she fix her toys after playing, when she helps me make the bed, when she is being kind to others. There are also the times when I tell her that she is pretty (she really is!), or that I am proud of her, or that she is smart when she does something witty.

My point is- in every one bad thing that you do, make sure you do good three times more. If you discipline one time, praise and motivate three times more. If you hurt someone (whether intentional or not), make up for it three times. WHY? SO THAT THE GOOD THINGS WILL BE REMEMBERED AND NOT THE BAD ONE. At the end of the day, we want to put emphasis on the good and not the bad. We want to build loving, happy relationships.

So, the next time you do something that may have hurt someone, don’t be too hard on yourself because now, we know better what to do next…

Wishing you all a fun-tastic weekend ahead! 🙂

Cheers,

Nina

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My First Meet & Greet Weekend Party

Hello Everyone!

I have not done any party hosting in the blogging community so this would officially be my first ever meet & greet party. 🙂  Being said that, I really hope that you guys can join me so we could get to know each other and your blogs more.

Please come take a seat and let’s talk about you and your interesting blog. I hope that you’ll enjoy your stay 🙂

Glad to know you,
Nina 🙂

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Happy Thanksgiving!

“Gratitude can transform common days into Thanksgiving, turn routine jobs into joy, and change ordinary opportunities into blessings.”- William Arthur Ward

Thanksgiving is one of my favorite holidays because it reminds me of how blessed I am in my life. When I switch on my “focus on the good stuffs” mode, I realize how there are so many things that I should be grateful for.

Here are some of the things that I’m really thankful for:
  • Relationships. It gives me opportunity to love, to care, to be kind, and to think of others aside from my self. My relationship with others is what makes me human. It gives me infinite joy to share love and goodness with other people- be it my family, friends, co-workers, or acquaintances.
  • Time. I’m grateful for the time I have to spend with my favorite people in the world. I’m grateful for the time I could use to do the things that I love to do like write on my blog or play my guitar. I’m thankful for the time that I could spend for myself- the time to meditate, to read, or the time to just be alone and do nothing.
  • Trials. I’m thankful for the problems, the trying times, and even for the failures that I encounter in life. Because of trials, we get to know our strengths, and we get to test our patience and perseverance.  I know they give pain, headaches and heartaches, but it’s what makes us stronger, wiser, and better people.
  • Myself. I thank myself for making me realize that I could be happy by being me. When I listen to myself, it tells me my heart’s desires. It tells me what I need to do to improve my well-being in all the different aspects of my life. And it also tells me when I need to take a break or to stop!
  • The simple things that gives me much pleasure. Music. Flowers. Coffee. The clouds and the stars in the sky. The smell of the trees. The sound of the birds. A walk. Good conversations. Laugh for my mistakes. And for a delicious meal!
How about you?
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Here’s my take-away quote for Thanksgiving- something that we can ponder on.
“Not what we say about our blessings, but how we use them, is the true measure of our thanksgiving. ~ W. T. Purkiser”
…and REMEMBER:
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Love Yourself.

“Self-care is never a selfish act—it is simply good stewardship of the only gift I have, the gift I was put on earth to offer to others.”– Parker Palmer

Some people think it’s selfish to love yourself and to take care of yourself before others.

I’ll tell you why it’s not, and it’s pretty simple: WE CAN ONLY GIVE THE BEST OF OURSELVES WHEN WE ARE IN OUR BEST.

If we always give love, without taking some, we’ll eventually ran out of love to give.

If we keep being kind, without experiencing some, we’ll eventually tire of being kind.

If we always look out for others, and forget to lookout for ourselves, sooner or later we will be the one in danger.

Imagine that you have a “goodness vessel” in you, and you get all the love and care that you give out to others from this vessel. If this vessel is not being refilled, it will eventually ran out.

So does this mean that we do nice things to others so that they do the same to us then? Do we give love so people will love us back? Do we need to be kind so people will be kind to us? Then our vessel will be refilled?
The answer is NO. Not necessarily. Because we ourselves can love and be kind to our own selves.

After a day’s work, before you retreat for the evening, or during the first hour of the day, you can actually switch to your “Me Time” mode. Do things that gives you happiness because it invigorates your soul. You can meditate, read a book, visit your garden and smell the flowers, jog, paint, scribble on your journal, cuddle up with your love ones, or drink your favorite coffee or eat ice cream!

Gisele Bundchen said that, “If you are happy, you can give happiness. If you don’t love yourself and if you are unhappy with yourself, you can’t give anything else but that.” I definitely agree with her.

If you love your self, you become happier. And if you are happy, it is easier for people around you to be happy too! As the old song says, “…learning to love yourself is the greatest love of all.” 🙂

I wish everyone a great week ahead!

Cheers,
Nina

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Look Down from the Top!

“It’s not what you look at that matters. It’s what you see.”- Henry David Thoreau

Have you ever experience feeling a little down at times without any particular sensible reason at all?

What I am about to tell you might probably be the reason.
If you’re an employee, things at work could get pretty boring and dull especially when you do the same thing over and over and there’s no new challenges.

If you’re a parent like me, there are times when raising a kid could be such a pain…imagine sacrificing your “ME” time to have a “WE” time with them, even if you just want to go to bed and sleep, or watch your favorite game, or hang-out with your friends, or just get done with whatever urgent thing you need to do.

If you have a spouse or a partner, sometimes being a partner could also be tiresome… especially when you do same stuffs and talk about the same topics…“How’s your day at work?”…”How’s your day with the children?…”

The thing is, when we get caught up with our routine and look at the things that happen to us everyday in the same angle, sometimes it could get tiresome, and boring, and trust me when I say that it could elicit more negative emotions.

What I am trying to say here is that when your life is dragging you down because it seems monotonous, shift your view. Don’t be the hiker with a heavy backpack looking up from below. Look down from the mountaintop and you forget your heavy backpack when you see the beautiful view!

If you’re getting tired of your work, think of the things that you are able to do because of the income that you’re getting. Think of the people who are happy to be working with you (and yes, you can imagine how life at work could be difficult without your presence!)

If you think you’re sacrificing too much as a parent, think of the BIG impact that your time spent with your children will do to them. You are making yourself visible in their lives. They will remember a happy childhood. They will grow confident and will not worry about having to please others to get attention. They will develop a good sense of who they are because you are giving them exactly that when you spend wonderful amazing time with them.

If you’re getting bored with talking to your spouse about the same personal stuffs…well, would you rather have him/her talk about those with another person? 🙂 Kidding aside, perhaps that’s a clue that you need to create new adventures together!

So the next time you’re feeling down, change where you’re looking from. 🙂
I wish everyone a happy week ahead!

 

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A Happy Story# 5- “Making Magic”

 

Sharer: Jennie-  A Teacher’s Reflection

Hello Everyone!

I am delighted to share with you today a happy story from one of my favorite bloggers, Jennie. I hope that you will enjoy her story as much as I did!

Thank you Jennie for sharing us a piece of your happiness thru your true to life magical story! 🙂

 


Each year I host a party for children and their families, and every year it creates magic– not the storybook or pretend magic, but something very real.

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Families gather with their children when school closes and have a pizza party on the playground.  That event alone is incredibly exciting for young children.  This year the weather was warm for New England, approaching 70 degrees.  It was also foggy.  Perfect for what was about to happen!

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We carved pumpkins into Jack-O-Lanterns.  That took quite a while; plenty of time for families to get to know each other, and plenty of time for each child and family to spend time together, doing something really fun.  Yet, it was far more than fun.

Darkness descended and transformed carving pumpkins into another world of wonder and splendor.  Imagine what it must be like for a child to be at school in the dark.  When we stopped to look at all the Jack-O-Lanterns, everyone felt a great shift to somethingmagical.  This is what I wrote to families:

Tonight was a magical evening.  Pizza dinner at school is pretty cool; yet carving a pumpkin with your family is a memory builder.  We so enjoyed all the activity and excitement with each family.  As the sun was setting, arranging all the jack-o-lanterns on the stone wall was filled with anticipation.  Sitting together in a circle with our jack-o-lanterns and singing songs, as it became dark, was… perfect.  Truly, it was a moment in time, the kind that leaves you with a feeling deep in your chest, yet you cannot find words to explain it.  You just know that it is special.  Often it is the little moments that are the most important and the best of all.  Thank you for being there.

We gathered all together in a big circle.  Jack-O-Lanterns were lit.  Children were snuggled with their families.  We sang the Jack-O-Lantern song, twice.  The excitement of the singing the song in the dark was magical, indeed.

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Yes, it was a moment that leaves you with a feeling deep in your chest, one that is difficult to explain, yet you know is special.  It is magic!

Jennie

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What’s It Gonna Be?

“The key to immortality is first living a life worth remembering.”- Bruce Lee

Everybody knows Johnny in his neighborhood as a kind man. Everyday he did something nice to someone. He always helped whenever he can without expecting anything in return. He is known to be a dependable friend and that is how he is remembered…so it’s written in his epitaph.

Susan is a loving mother. She made sure her children came first all the time. She always considered what’s best for them, and never did a day passed without letting them feel they are loved. She took great care of her children. She was the best mom and she’s remembered for that… so it’s written in her epitaph.

Mike was the positive guy. You will never see him without a smile in his face. He was the person to go to when somebody feels sad. Why not? He made sure you’re always in a better state after spending time with him. He is the rainbow to someone’s storm. People remember him as that…so it’s written in his epitaph.

How about you? If you’ll die today or tomorrow, what would you like written on your epitaph?

And here’s the more important question- Is that really how people would remember you?

If your answer is Yes, then that’s awesome. It means you are living and not merely existing.
But if your answer is No, then perhaps it’s time to face your biggest challenge- CHANGE. Because what you’re doing today, and how you are in your relationship with others NOW say a lot for your future epitaph.

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Happy Thoughts: LIFE RACE

The fastest guy didn’t win the race…

It’s the guy who slowed down to help others,
the one who paused to smell the flowers,
the one who took the time to enjoy moments with loved ones,
the one who stopped to listen and care.

The guy who has the most LOVE, JOY and PEACE when he got to the finished line is the real winner.

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Because You Can!

“JUST DO IT!”- NIKE slogan

Sometimes, when I go to the grocery store, there are some free taste for new products. And even if I very much wanted to try it out, I feel very shy and I just passed on them…OR when I finally master my courage, the free taste samples are no longer there because a lot of people have already taken advantage of them, and then I would feel disappointed on myself…and a little sad too, and maybe even mad if I really really like the product!

You see, this scenario is also applicable in other real life situations. How many of us has passed on opportunities because we feel like we’re not worthy of it? OR we feel like we don’t really have what it takes to do it? OR we fall short to match the criteria? OR we think that there’s another person more suitable for it? OR because we failed before and we’re going to fail again? OR…OR…OR…And  yet every time we say “NO” to these opportunities, we feel bad for that decision because we feel and know deep in our hearts that we could do it and succeed!

I have  experienced these not only once or twice or three times, but more… and I feel awful every time. Especially when I know that I am better than the person who grabbed that opportunity; or when I know that I have the skill and knowledge to take that chance; and more so when I know that it could have been the life-changing moment for me.

You see, there is abundance of possibilities and blessings in life, and all it takes for us is to have the courage to say YES! When they come knocking to our door, we should not think that we do not deserve them or that other people deserve them more than we do. Believe it or not, YOU ARE WORTHY. Until you recognize that, you will never get the chance to take advantage of the freebies that life offers. So go ahead, don’t be shy and take your fair share! 🙂

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It’s all about RELATIONSHIP

“And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is LOVE.”               – 1 Corinthians 13:13

Do you want a happy life? A life worth living? A life that is enjoyable? A life that is meaningful?… I tell you what. YOU CAN HAVE IT!

How? By nurturing and growing your relationships. Take great care of them more than you care for your expensive car or jewelries. The other areas of your life like your finances or health could suffer, and you could still be happy- I’ve seen poor people who are happy because they have such close family relationships and good friends. I know people who are sick but are happy because they have people who love and care for them…but I’ve never seen or known someone who’s truly happy living alone for himself.

We need people to satisfy our need to feel safe, to feel that we belong, and to build our self-esteem.

Here are 3 things that will help make relationships better:
1. Say “Thank You”- never keep your gratitude to yourself. say it to people who deserve to be thanked. Say thank you for the fun time, for the good meal cooked for you, for the great conversation, for the encouraging word, for the gestures of love…for the simplest or even the corniest reason.

2. Say “I’m Sorry”- apologize when you did something wrong even if it wasn’t intended. Admit your fault and just say sorry that you made a mistake. And sometimes, even if it’s not your fault, you still apologize. People who care more for the person and the relationship apologize first because caring and loving comes first to being righteous. Pride will give you nothing but a cold lonely heart.

3. Say “I love You”- Do not get tired of saying this everyday. Say it to your spouses/partners, children, parents, siblings, friends…fill-up your love tank. No one dies of love-overdose. This is something a person could get as much as he or she wants. And the good thing is that this is FREE. So give as much as you could and it’ll come back to you doubled or tripled!

If you want a happy life, have happy relationships- with God, with others & with yourself! 🙂

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What Makes You Human?

“All labor that uplifts humanity has dignity and importance and should be undertaken with painstaking excellence.”- Martin Luther King Jr.

Hello Everyone,

I hope this week has been good to you so far. 🙂
I’ve seen this ad  yesterday while playing my music in YouTube, and I am really moved by it. In fact, it makes me wonder…do we really need unpleasant events to happen before we show how or what it is to be humane?

Think about it… when’s the last time you’ve shown genuine sympathy or concern to others? When’s the last time you’ve shown kindness and generosity to strangers? When’s the last time you’ve said encouraging words to a seemingly deppressed soul?

It is sad to think that there are some of us who have this perception that the world is a dangerous place; and in trying to protect ourselves, we become more and more self-centered, and little by little losing our humanity.

It feels good to be able to help and love others. Even sweet and awesome at the same time actually. We are human and we’re meant to be humane. Let’s not forget that!

I hope this video will awaken the humane spirit within you… Take care everyone!

 

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Are you “Iffy Happy”?

“Happiness is a choice, not a result. Nothing will make you happy until you choose to be happy…”- Ralph Marston

When I was younger, I used to be “iffy” with my happiness.

I’d be happy if I’d get myself a gorgeous boyfriend…
I’d be happy if I’d get more allowance…
I’d be happy if I could buy that pretty dress…
I’d be happy if I’d get accepted to this university…

And I don’t think I was any different from other people who seemed to be setting a high  standard for happiness.

Those who think that they’d be happy
if they’d get more popular
if they’d get a bigger house
if they’d get a fatter wallet
if they’d get a higher position in their jobs
if they’d get better-looking
if they’d get themselves spouses who’d always put them first

We become unhappy because we set impossible rules to experience happiness. We make it sooo darn difficult for ourselves to achieve.

I am very grateful to have started my blog. I wasn’t a happy person then, but I decided and choose to be one. This is also the reason why I named it “thehappylife”- because that is the kind of life that I want to have.

Can I tell you a secret? I find it easy to be happy because I make my conditions to be happy really simple. I could give you 5 reasons why I am happy today.

#1- I woke up with my husband besides me.
#2- I get to kiss & hug my daughter goodbye when she left for school
#3- I get to have a heart to heart talk with our maid- where she has confided in me her personal problems and I was able to comfort her.
#4- I was able to come to work on time, and enjoyed a meeting with our boss, and some other colleagues over a good coffee. 🙂
#5- I could feel my heart beat in my chest and I can smile

…and believe me when I say I could go on and on…

What are your pre-requisites for happiness? Are you sure they’re not too complicated that you’ll never get to be happy at all?

Life is short. Enjoy it. Be grateful and you’ll find more reasons to be happy! 🙂

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A Happy Story #4- “Thank You”

I love Sundays. It is our family day.

I remember this one time when we’re on the road…
My hubby was driving and I was at the backseat with my daughter. When it’s only the 3 of us, I like staying at the backseat with my little girl so that I could touch her and look at her when we chat.

Like always, she talks a lot. She talks about the things that she sees around, she talks about the billboards that she sees along the way, and whatever things that cross her mind.

When she gets tired, she lays her head on my arms or lap. One time she did that, I kissed her head. And then she said, “Mommy, thank you for kissing me.”

That moment is one of the happiest moments in my life- knowing that my daughter appreciates how I show my love and care for her. I still get a little emotional sometimes whenever I remember that incident.

How many of us take the time to say “Thank You” for the love and care that we get from family, friends, or colleagues? Sometimes, it is easy to forget- especially if it is “expected” of them or when “we’re used to” being treated as such.

But you know what, it’s a wonderful feeling to be thanked and appreciated. 🙂

I hope to share your story next time. See below how.
Have a great weekend everyone! Remember to bond with people today, and not with technology!

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Did you miss the previous stories? Check them here.                                                                  Inspire someone by sharing your happy story! Here’s how to submit.

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Posted in Life & Wellness, Random Happiness

LIFE LESSONS: Interview With God

Hello Friends,

This video that I am sharing with you today is one of the most remarkable videos that I’ve seen so far. I first saw it when I was a freshman in College and I have not forgotten about it.

There are many things that I realized about life in general when I saw this. Perhaps some of you are already familiar with this, but I’d still want to share it as it is a very good reminder for all of us.

I hope that this video will all move us to live our lives better. 🙂

(Video taken from YouTube)

THE INTERVIEW WITH GOD

I dreamed I had an interview with God.

 

“Come in,” God said. “So, you would like to interview Me?”

“If you have the time,” I said.

God smiled and said:

“My time is eternity and is enough to do everything; What questions do you have in mind to ask me?”

 

“What surprises you most about mankind?”

God answered:

“That they get bored of being children, are in a rush to grow up, and then long to be children again…

That they lose their health to make money and then lose their money to restore their health…

That by thinking anxiously about the future, they forget the present, such that they live neither for the present nor the future…

That they live as if they will never die, and they die as if they had never lived.”

 

God’s hands took mine and we were silent for awhile and then I asked… “As a parent, what are some of life’s lessons you want your children to learn?”

God replied with a smile:

“To learn that they cannot make anyone love them. What they can do is to let themselves be loved…

To learn that what is most valuable is not what they have in their lives, but who they have in their lives…

To learn that it is not good to compare themselves to others. All will be judged individually on their own merits, not as a group on a comparison basis…

To learn that a rich person is not the one who has the most, but is one who needs the least…

To learn that it only takes a few seconds to open profound wounds in persons we love, and that it takes many years to heal them…

To learn to forgive by practicing forgiveness…

To learn that there are persons that love them dearly, but simply do not know how to express or show their feelings…

To learn that money can buy everything but happiness…

To learn that two people can look at the same thing and see it totally different…

To learn that a true friend is someone who knows everything about them, and likes them anyway…

To learn that it is not always enough that they be forgiven by others, but that they have to forgive themselves.”

 

I sat there for awhile enjoying the moment. I thanked Him for his time and for all that He has done for me and my family, and He replied, “Anytime. I’m here 24 hours a day. All you have to do is ask for me, and I’ll answer.”

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Posted in Motivational, Positive Thinking

Design Your Future

“One reason so few of us achieve what we truly want is that we never direct our focus; we never concentrate our power. Most people dabble their way through life, never deciding to master anything in particular.”- Tony Robbins

There are some people who fail to be successful because they don’t know what they want. And there are also some successful people who are not happy because they succeeded on the “wrong field”- and what I mean by that is they are successful, but not on THAT thing that they are supposed to be successful at.

So how do we know what we want? How do we figure out where we should be successful at? How do we live a Successful AND Happy life?

The answer is simple. YOU HAVE TO DESIGN YOUR LIFE.

Easier said than done. I know. But read again. I said the answer is simple, I didn’t say it’s easy.

You see, like any other plans that we have made into a reality, that is how we design our life too.- we conceive ideas, carefully think of the steps that we have to do to achieve them, and putting those steps into action.- The only difference is we’re looking at it in a bigger picture this time. It’s more difficult, but I honestly feel that it is more exciting too!

Many of us are so busy surviving and just making a living, but that is not our purpose in life. Who we become and what we can give in this life is up to us. We must ignite that drive to take full responsibility and control of our lives. We have to be passionate with life and know that it is more than just surviving or acquiring things. Successful and happy living is knowing who we are, loving what we do, and being able to share something to the world.

In your quiet times, meditate on your life. Picture your future self- NOT base on where you are now, but base it on how you would like it to be. Where is your life’s direction?

  • Think of the things that gives you happiness and satisfaction just by merely doing it. This is where you need to focus your time and energy because this is your “field”.
  • Write down your action plans and goals. How can you be better at this/these area/areas? What do you need to do? Who are the people that you need to involve. Identify your mini-goals and greater goals and make sure that these goals inspire  you.
  • Cultivate your values. What are your beliefs and morals? It is important that they aligned with the steps that you’re going to carry out in pursuit of your goals.

I personally believe that God did not put us on earth simply to survive. We are here to experience a good and fulfilling life. If there is something or an area in your life that is off or not working, now is the right time to decide to change it!

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Posted in Life & Wellness, Relationships

The Beauty of Living in Simplicity

“The people who keep their lifestyle natural as much as possible to the decency level meet quite often in life a beautiful person.” – Anuj Somany

Let me tell you a real life story of someone I know who is very famous and successful.
His dad was an assistant VP on a humongous company, and yet he did not grow up pampered and spoiled as most rich kids are. His parents lived a life of simplicity- they did not live in a mansion nor owned luxury cars. Theirs is just a typical medium-size home and a Toyota car of more than 10 years old.

In his elementary days, he was taught to commute going to and from school. And he looks forward to every Sunday because that is the only time they are allowed to drink Coke. He also did not own a lot of toys- but then once a week, he and his dad visited the mall and there he would see all the toys that he loved and he would imagine that he owned all of them. He and his dad would also always try to look for something that they could give her mom when they go home.

Now, you would think that he was deprived, but you know what, you’ll be surprised to know that he never felt that way. Because he was always treated with much care and love. He need not do anything to get attention from his parents.

Everyday, he and his dad would jog together on their garage… and then he would sit on his dad’s lap and they talk about anything in the world. After dinner, he and his dad would sit beside each other and read their favorite comics until it’s time for bed. After praying as a family, he would see his parents in their bedroom- where his dad was seated on his chair, and her mom standing behind him, massaging his back while the they talked about how their day was.

This is the beauty of living in simplicity. Imagine if his parents chose to live in a more luxurious manner. His dad would then have to work overtime to pay off the bills- he would get too tired everyday to even spend time talking to his boy and wife every night. He might also be haggard and ill-tempered brought about by stress. And his mom would perhaps even need to find work to help with the finances.

Who would then jog with this poor boy everyday? and talk to him and answer his unending questions about the world? and who would then read comic books with him? and go hanging out to the mall with him? … and would he be the successful person he is today both in his career and family, if his childhood experience would have been different?

I hope his story moves you. It definitely inspired me. Let’s not forget that how we choose to live our life does not only affect our own happiness, but also the happiness of the people that we love! 🙂

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Posted in Blogging, Life & Wellness, Positive Thinking

A Blog Worth Sharing- #7

Hello Everyone! 🙂

Today, I am very excited to share with you one of my favorite blogs. I like that the style is different from the usual blogs that I read. It is artistic, intelligent, and funny too! 🙂 I strongly recommend that you visit and read this blog.

It is about “observations of modern day life observed through the eyes of two cats and a human.” I really enjoy this blog and I hope that you’d feel the same.

Thank you Allan Gilmour for your creativity and wit! You’re simply amazing!

Gilmours-Nice-Place.JPG

BLOG NAME: Gilmours Nice Place

POSTS TITLE:
How to stop complaining, grumbling, and, moaning

“Mr Midnight had started  wearing a purple latex band around one of his legs and he was now proudly parading around the garden so that Sir Winston could see it.

SW-Avatar       What have you got tied to your leg Mr Midnight? It looks quite funny.

MM-Avatar       It´s a new therapy I´m practicing…”

 
Losing Control

 “MM-AvatarI´m glad that I´m a cat this time round daddy and not a human being.

author-Avatar       And why is that Mr Midnight?  Can you remember a disturbing event from one of your past lives or something?

MM-Avatar       Not really. I sometimes have strange flashbacks burning my brain but that could also have something to do with the fact that I haven´t drank enough fluids.

I don´t need to travel back to one of my past lives to be thankful that I´m a cat.

You human beings always remind me how good I´ve got it.”

 

(Featured Image: Source)

Posted in Blogging, Personal, Random Happiness

Some Things I Love…

Hello Everyone! 🙂

No serious post or discussion about love from me today. Rather, I am just sharing with you some of my favorites. Check them out and maybe you’ll like them too! 🙂

3 BEAUTIFUL SONGS OF LOVE that I think should have had more exposure:

Quiet- Jason Mraz

Enough For YouJoshua Radin

Kiss MeEd Sheeran

MUST WATCH MOVIES ABOUT LOVE:

The NotebookThe Notebook.JPG

Pride & PrejudicePride & Prejudice.JPG

My Best Friend’s WeddingMy Bestfriend's Wedding.JPG

MY FAVORITE LOVE NOVELS with unexpected twists/endings:

Pop: The Fault in our Stars– John Green
Classic: Wuthering Heights– Emily Bronte

The Fault in our Stars.JPGWuthering Heights.JPG

MY FAVORITE LOVE POEMS:

Happy: Sonnet 29 by William Shakespeare

When, in disgrace with fortune and men’s eyes,
I all alone beweep my outcast state,
And trouble deaf heaven with my bootless cries,
And look upon myself and curse my fate,
Wishing me like to one more rich in hope,
Featured like him, like him with friends possessed,
Desiring this man’s art and that man’s scope,
With what I most enjoy contented least;
Yet in these thoughts myself almost despising,
Haply I think on thee, and then my state,
(Like to the lark at break of day arising
From sullen earth) sings hymns at heaven’s gate;
For thy sweet love remembered such wealth brings
That then I scorn to change my state with kings.

Sad: When You Are Old by William Butler Yeats

When You Are Old
When you are old and grey and full of sleep,
And nodding by the fire, take down this book,
And slowly read, and dream of the soft look
Your eyes had once, and of their shadows deep;

How many loved your moments of glad grace,
And loved your beauty with love false or true,
But one man loved the pilgrim soul in you,
And loved the sorrows of your changing face;

And bending down beside the glowing bars,
Murmur, a little sadly, how Love fled
And paced upon the mountains overhead
And hid his face amid a crowd of stars

THE THINGS I LOVE TO DO aside from Writing:

MY FAVORITE ROMANTIC MOVIE QUOTES:

Pride & Prejudice-quote.jpg

The Fault in our Stars-quotes.JPG

Moulin Rouge.JPG

GREATEST ADVICE ON LOVE:

Love for Enemies (Luke 6:27-36, Bible)

27 “But to you who are listening I say: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, 28 bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. 29 If someone slaps you on one cheek, turn to them the other also. If someone takes your coat, do not withhold your shirt from them. 30 Give to everyone who asks you, and if anyone takes what belongs to you, do not demand it back. 31 Do to others as you would have them do to you.

32 “If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners love those who love them. 33 And if you do good to those who are good to you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners do that. 34 And if you lend to those from whom you expect repayment, what credit is that to you? Even sinners lend to sinners, expecting to be repaid in full.35 But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be children of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked. 36 Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful.

I hope you have enjoyed my lists. Let me know yours! 🙂

nina-feb

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NOTE: I do not take credit for the photos & videos used on this post. They are merely taken from the Internet.

Posted in Inspirational, Life & Wellness, Relationships

Oldies but Goodies!

Hello Everyone,

This week is a very busy week for me. It’s my daughter’s quarter exam week at school, my mom’s here with us for a visit, and it’s the time at work again when I have to do my month-end reports…

Anyways, I still don’t want to leave you guys with nothing on my blog. So here are some of my older posts (written during my first months of blogging) that I would like to share with you again especially that it fits my theme for this month of February. Enjoy!…and I am still  interested on what think of the posts 🙂

nina-feb

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Posted in Blogging, Random Happiness

Thank you for the Love!

I want to say my big THANK YOU to the following Bloggers for their award nominations for my blog. 🙂

Thank you Nikki of Flying Through Water  for the Blogger Recognition Award.

bloggerrecognition.png

How my blog started: I really love to write, but my passion for writing was put aside for a long time. I have a family to take care of and I also have a regular job so I didn’t feel that I have enough time to write. But I got inspired after watching one  TED Talk that discussed about finding your passion and purpose. I remember the speaker said “If money is not an issue, what is it that you would be doing?… I say you should do it now“…That’s what got me into starting my blog.

Advice for new bloggers: Whenever you write something, just remember that your words could make or break a person. That’s how powerful words are- so even if we have the freedom to express our own thoughts & ideas, we still have to be careful on the articles that we publish. 

Thank you Jo Smith, The Inquisitive Writer for the Mystery Blogger Award.

mystery-bloggerWhat is your most valuable possession? The love letters from my hubby-I know it’s cheesy but I still have them 🙂
How long have you been blogging? About 9 months. I started mid-May last year.
Where do you want to travel next? If given the chance, I really like to see Greece.
What is your mission? To spark a bit of happiness or hope to someone out there who needs it. 🙂
Do you like soup? What type of soup? (The silly question) Yes. Crab & corn and Nido soups taste good to me.

Thank you Andrei of THOUGHTS AVENUE: Speak you mind for the Valiant Blogger Award.

valiant-blogger-award.jpgMy Greatest Challenge in my life & how I got through it: 
I consider it my greatest challenge to get pregnant. I have a Polycystic Ovary Syndrome (PCOS) which causes hormonal imbalance and it makes it difficult to get pregnant. For a long time, I didn’t eat rice and I exercised in the gym every other day with my hubby. We also jogged together on weekends. Eventually, I got pregnant! 🙂 Discipline, Support from loved ones, and Prayers are all that I needed.

My Piece of Advice to people struggling with something in their life: When the going gets tough, know that it is God’s way of saying “I have better plans for you”…You may not understand it at first but you just have to put your faith and trust in Him. You’ll know the reason sooner or later.

 

I am truly grateful for all your recognition.

nina-feb

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